Tiny New Life

My husband Josh and I have officially been married for one month! Definitely not what I foresaw in my future about eight months ago...

I'm honestly so grateful for our teeny little apartment with the dishwasher that doesn't like to close or open very well, our $20 futon that we bought from a college student, our kitchen that's really just half of a hallway, and the food budget that keeps me impossibly in check. The fact that we're dealing with things right now - together - that are less than satisfactory is probably an incredible blessing for our new marriage. Because you know already that life is going to throw stuff at you that's far from desirable.

And we get to start out with things that are a bit tricky.
When I was a kid I was annoyed that we never bought anything brand-name. Shopping was about finding the cheapest deals - especially when it came to food. I was embarrassed that my mom would add water or powdered milk to the milk gallon to make it stretch. I hated eating the heels of a loaf of bread.

But it has given me so much experience to save money for me and my husband now, in our new marriage. And you know what? I choose any off-brand I can get at the grocery store. I add a little water to the milk to make it last, I freeze vegetables, I don't buy the silly junk food I'm craving. And I don't even mind eating bread heels anymore.

There are many moments in my life where I spent my thoughts on wishing to be ahead: older, wiser, in a different place, obviously with a better life purpose. But I can't do that anymore. First off, I know that these moments with Josh are going to fly by and suddenly there's going to be a tiny person seeking both our attention all of the time (I'm twenty-three weeks pregnant as we speak).

As it is, I've got time for me every day. And I've got time with him.

Maybe that's enough.

I want more, don't get me wrong. I feel lazy for not working. I hate that dishes and cooking and tidying the apartment are constants in my life. I can't seem to get anything done that seems "important." I get so proud of myself for working out in the morning, but then I'm exhausted the rest of the day.

What's something you wished away that now you would gladly take back? What do you do to make each moment one not of regret but of satisfaction?

"You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days 
Hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this..."
~Randy Travis

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